Warning to Americans if Romney Loses ( old satire)


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    Warning to Americans if Romney Loses
    Submitted by B3 on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 14:15
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    DP Original 
    

    AS you all know, the American electorate is divided like never before. Emotions are running high, and the mutually acrimonious tone between the campaigns and their supporters should be a cause for grave concern for our republic.

    Murmurings of discontent are in the air, the people are restless, and intonations of hostility emanate from the twittersphere, the pulse of the nation. Veiled threats of violence pervade the national dialogue.

    In the event that Mitt Romney doesn't win, I fear the anger and frustration of America's upperclasses may spill over into outright violence.

    In this vein and in the spirit of public safety I offer you the following tips and guidelines for election night.

    AVOID middle to upperclass neighborhoods, small businesses, and in particular suburbs and heavily Mormon areas.

    If you see a crowd of predominately young Mormons, lock your car doors and drive past quickly - do not stop.

    Avoid being caught out alone on foot in a gated community or down a charming cul de sac; have an obvious escape route.

    Don't travel by yourself and do not run low on gas out in the suburbs or in the vicinity of a financial district.

    If you live in a predominantly suburban or rural area with a good school district, take special precautions; lock your doors and shut the lights, do not draw attention.

    Particular establishments to avoid: golf courses, country clubs, or anywhere within seven miles of a Nascar venue. Know your surroundings.

    Keep your cell phone and GPS charged, and use the buddy system.

    If you see any groups of possible Mormons or upperclass professionals milling about or entering an establishment you're in, do not engage. Move swiftly towards an area near public transport, subsidized housing, multiple checks cashed spots or a chicken shack with bulletproof glass. Romney backers should be scant.

    Utah and Nevada can be expected to be special danger hot spots If any well dressed, polite Mormon missionaries approach you, RUN DON'T WALK. They know were you live, and will be pissed.

    President Obama has taken note of the numerous threats to the public order and has taken proper precautions; volunteers from Obama strongholds like Detroit and Chicago will be stationed nearby polling places and on call throughout election evening to maintain domestic tranquility.

    Be safe,

    OMBAMA2012

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    I actually explained what would happen in August or so.
    Submitted by Paul_S. on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 18:25. Permalink

    The MSM would work to help each side that the other guy was so rotten that the would be afraid not to vote.

    If 70% refused to vote then their is no mandate to continue running this bankrupt government.

    Free includes debt-free!

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    No laughing matter...
    Submitted by Tumbleweed Steve on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 18:02. Permalink

    The neo-cons are already vandalizing our Gary Johnson signs in these neighborhoods. People in nice new cars and trucks are giving the single finger salute at those of us with Ron Paul bumper stickers and Gary Johnson T-shirts. I have repeatedly been accosted on area 9:12 and TEA party sites for not supporting Mitt-Witt, being told that I am going to waste my vote for Johnson, or that by voting for Gary Johnson I am some how helping Obama get elected again.
    The world has become a scary place.
    No matter who wins...get ready for some fireworks.

    RAND PAUL or NOT AT ALL

    reply 
    

    LOL...
    Vote up!
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    Good Piece
    Submitted by ZJ on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 12:36. Permalink

    Did Limbaugh imply that Obama supporters would go on a rampage? Seems like all his listeners are parroting the same thing.

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    Warning: WHEN Obamao loses, these idiots
    Submitted by Dixie-Paleocon on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 12:21. Permalink

    that support him are going to go on a rampage. Be sure to stock up on plenty of rubber bullets, mace, and billy clubs.

    http://www.dailypaul.com/260346/liberals-turn-to-dirty-trick...

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    Rubber
    Submitted by Metal_Mulisha on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 18:11. Permalink

    Hell...

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    Who else burns signs on lawns?
    Submitted by Jane Aitken on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 12:14. Permalink

    I'm not even a Romney supporter but I am constantly attacked with verbal profanity and threats against me if Obama loses.

    What other group do you know terrorizes people by burning signs on lawns?

    http://t.co/GD4k8uKj

    Jane Aitken, 35-Year Veteran Teacher
    Ron Paul 2008 Consultant
    GOP Woman of the Year 2009
    Founder NH Tea Party Coalition (NOT AFFILIATED WITH ANY FAKE 2009 GROUP)
    Founder USPEINetwork @ Yahoo (Nat'l Edu Activism Group)
    Board Coalition of NH Taxpayers

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    A lot of Obama supporters are
    Submitted by compromise on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 12:22. Permalink

    A lot of Obama supporters are radical leftists and highly dangerous.

    The Romney guys tend to scheme behind the scenes more.

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    +1
    Submitted by YG364 on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 11:39. Permalink

    LOL!

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    Stay clear of bridge clubs too
    Submitted by Ian56 on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 09:50. Permalink

    The blue rinse brigade may turn violent.

    "In the end, more than they wanted freedom, they wanted security. They wanted a comfortable life, and they lost it all -- security, comfort, and freedom. When ... the freedom they wished for was freedom from responsibility, then Athens ceased to be free."

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    You are funny
    Submitted by Bozhi on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 22:52. Permalink

    I got a robocall from Romney today. The problem with this call is that I was at work, in a casino, supervising craps games. I told the guys working on the craps game that Romney was calling and he wanted donations. One of the guys said "Tell Romney we take money, we do not give away money."

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    lol.....
    Submitted by SIERRAHPBT on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 19:39. Permalink

    lol.....

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    Mr. Scan Man
    Submitted by TheKingIsComing on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 17:43. Permalink

    http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=tE0M9R1YXH0

    TheKingIsComing

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    ROFLMFAO!!!
    Submitted by FreedomIsAbsolute on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 17:27. Permalink

    I cannot stop laughing!

    “When a well-packaged web of lies has been sold gradually to the masses over generations, the truth will seem utterly preposterous and its speaker a raving lunatic.” – Dresden James

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    If Willard wins, my dog is
    Submitted by bcfast on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 17:18. Permalink

    going into hiding!!! Rmoney just might implement a new NAU mandate that all dogs must ride on car roofs!!! Oh, the humanity....


    BC
    Silence isn't always golden....sometimes it's yellow.

    "The liberties of a people never were, nor ever will be, secure, when the transactions of their rulers may be concealed from them." - Patrick Henry

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    Brilliant,
    Submitted by FortheGoodDoctor on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 17:16. Permalink

    per usual. Those rabble-rousers.

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    Warning to America if Obama looses... Romney will implement...
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    Obama Supporters
    Submitted by PsychoWorld on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 17:08. Permalink

    Are MUCH more violent in general!

    "Truth is Treason in an Empire that lies" - Ron Paul

    Educate the masses, and win in the end.

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    Forget the Polls and Pundits
    Submitted by Caardvaark on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:47. Permalink

    Money talks. Click here to see the oddsmakers predictions in the American Presidential race.
    Obama is killin it!
    http://www.intrade.com/v4/markets/?eventId=84326

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    Like the stock market and commodities....
    Submitted by Kiss My Tea Bag on Fri, 10/26/2012 - 05:46. Permalink

    Intrade is ran buy groups that manipulate it for profit. Watch for a big sell-off 3 days before the election.

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    Hillarious!
    Submitted by Ralphizm on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:35. Permalink

    This reads out of something from the Zombie survival guide or world war z by Max Brooks!

    Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.

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    LOL!
    Submitted by Patriotess on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:26. Permalink

    That was a good laugh... thanx!

    NONE BUT PAUL!

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    If the only clothing you have is Dockers and a J-Crew shirt,
    Submitted by The Brandishabl... on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:25. Permalink

    try to wear them ironically.

    why are pandas exempt from RICO statutes?

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    Why???
    Submitted by jglisson on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:09. Permalink

    I'm more worried about Obama supporters being violent than I am Romney supporters.

    "No physical quantity explains it's own existence, and no amount of time can consume an infinite series of events to bring you to the present, which means all of these somewhere have to be explained by one self-existent cause which is not physical."

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    Really?
    Submitted by jmofaustin on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 17:56. Permalink

    It was a joke. The OP was making fun of the other stories about the threats if Obama loses.

    -Jacky
    TX

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    Haha very insightful
    Submitted by BmoreBrawler on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:08. Permalink

    Haha very insightful especially in response to the latest neocon talking point of "Rodney King part 2"

    Ventura 2012

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    lol 😛
    Submitted by pixel-chick on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 15:55. Permalink

    lol 😛

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    WTF?
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    You're on the wrong site pal...
    Submitted by pawnstorm12 on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 15:39. Permalink

    We are slightly more intelligent than that.

    Head on over to Huff Post and tout Obama as your choice.

    Who do you think we are???

    "We have allowed our nation to be over-taxed, over-regulated, and overrun by bureaucrats. The founders would be ashamed of us for what we are putting up with."
    -Ron Paul

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    "We are slightly more intelligent than that."
    Submitted by Bamobo on Thu, 10/25/2012 - 16:12. Permalink

    The irony. It burns.

    A signature used to be here!

    reply 
    
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